Airport stories from the cheese state!!!

Ok.....more airport stories....and I haven’t even made it to Madison yet.

Where am I going? I’m flying to Wisconsin for a gig at University of Wisconsin-Madison.

I’m currently sitting at the Milwaukee airport, waiting for my connecting flight. I’m surprised I even made it this far, considering the snow storm that just hit the Midwest. It took me an hour to get to the Indianapolis Airport, when it should only take 30 minutes.

For the whole drive, I was gripping the steering wheel, praying I would make it either on-time or alive....either would be good possibilities.

Then, my flight was delay an hour. Now, my connecting flight is also delayed for two hours.
While waiting in Milwaukee, someone once again decided that they should have a conversation with me. I look around and notice that everyone else is able to sit in peace and quiet, undisturbed. I must have some kind of sign that says, “I love to talk to random people!!!”

This guy will be referred to as Vitamin Man.













Why is his name Vitamin Man?

Well...once again I randomly meet a man who wants to go into great detail about his life, when I just want to read my book. Seriously.....does anyone care about privacy anymore?

We quickly went from, “Where are you flying?” to “I work in the Vitamin business, because I had all these health problems and couldn’t find a solution.....until I discovered vitamins!!!”

I don’t want to hear about your health problems.

Then he goes on to tell me how his sister has some minor health problems as well, but that she exaggerates them to the extreme. Once again, don’t know why I need to know this....

I say, “Oh so she is some form of a hypochondriac.”

He replies, “Eh....she just over-exaggerates and freaks out over any health problems she has.”
Um....isn’t that at least one description of a hypochondriac?

Then, he goes into description about one health condition of his sister. He decides that I need to be informed about her RASH.

Once again....WHY?!?!?!?!?

But don’t worry, he told me he found the solution. She was eating too much dairy. Once she stopped....POOF! No more rash.

Vitamin Man, thank you for such informative advice. When I get a big rash all over my body, I’ll stop drinking milk. I feel sooooo relieved.